movies with kids

today i went to see Pixar's new film Brave with my sister's family. here is what it is like watching a movie with two 3 year olds: first, count on arriving late bc it takes forever to get those kids in a car. this delay will result in having to sit in the very top row and not having enough seats so the babies have to sit on your laps. before the movie even starts, both girls will need to be taken to the restroom. but not at the same time - the second will only realize she wants to go after you get back with the first one. 

when they are actually watching the movie, they will provide helpful commentary, such as "THAT WAS SCARY!" or "WHERE'S MY SEAT?!" and, since you are on the top row, the entire theater gets to hear it. about half way through the movie, one will yell, "I HAVE TO GO POTTY! I'M PEEING MYSELF!" this time both of them will go out to the potty at the same time, but not before the second runs down the steps yelling, "WAIT FOR ME, DADDY!" 

by far the highlight occurs when the one sitting on your lap pours 1/4th of a Slushee out on herself, your shirt, and your new pants. if you are lucky (and i was), this will not be a red Slushee. while the couple next to you watches you shoving Kleenex down your shirt, said child will be alerting the theater that she wants a new shirt ("I WANT A NEW SHIRT!") and trying to get naked in public. by the end of the movie, at least one of the kids will be crying loudly for some unknown reason. (in our case the crying coincided with the princess on the screen crying so hopefully it just came off as sympathetic tears.) after the movie is over, both children will try to rush out of the theater and into the street before you can even get out of your seat. 

who wouldn't want to pay $40 for that experience?