Sunday, June 19, 2011

bathroom etiquette

i hate public restrooms but unless you are agoraphobic they are unavoidable. sadly, some people do not seem to understand how to behave in them. here are some general guidelines:

1. no talking. it is just awkward. if it is just you & your mom, i'll let it slide. but if anyone else enters the facilities, cease conversation immediately. no one wants to hear it.

2. no talking to me. even/especially if you are my mom, i will refuse to speak to you if i am in a stall.

3. the no talking rule goes double for cell phones. what is the person on the other end thinking?

4. if there are more than 2 stalls and 1 is occupied, use the one that does not border the occupied one. i do not understand how when there are 5 empty stalls, you are going to pick the only one that borders mine. (i always use the 1st stall b/c a) lower chance of someone being next to you and b) i read an article about how it was the cleanest b.c fewer people use it - stall 2 is the most used. fyi.)

5. if you are a male, being gay is not a valid reason for using the women's restroom. (i'm looking at you, Midtown)

6. if you are my male co-worker who keeps using the women's restroom & leaving the seat up - SERIOUSLY? the only person with a penis allowed in there is the transgendered girl & i'm pretty sure she's not putting the seat up. unless you are ready to fully commit to the life of a woman the way she has, walk the 15 feet around the corner and use the men's room.

1 comment:

Clint said...

The next time you go to the restroom, I'm going to start sending you a steady stream to text messages. Either that or stand at the door demanding that you listen to me talk about my feelings.