old addictions rear their ugly heads again

i've been on my feminist soapbox for about a month now. a variety random things have contributed to this renewed level of frustration. sadly, they all involved "The Church". the two things that bothered me the most, however, did not come from disappointing lessons or incredibly misguided ward activities (although those occurred). rather, they were communications i had that left me feeling very depressed about the perspectives of my generation on women in the church.

the first was an email i received from a friend of ChurchGirl who was interested in getting an MPH and had some questions. in providing me with some background about herself she talked at length about how she really wanted to be a doctor, but had realized that, "Being an MD, especially as a female physician, does not allow a mother to tend properly to her life outside of her practice." now, i am positive that this girl did not know that my mother is a female physician. or that i am so proud of having a doctor-mom & feel it is a huge blessing in my life. nevertheless, i was extremely offended/disappointed that she felt female physicians were incapable of being a good mothers. in my reply i tried to actually discuss her MPH questions, but i couldn't stop myself and the first paragraph was all about how even righteous LDS women could be doctors.

the second came from a conversation with some church friends about women issues.
(aside: my ward has had some feminist fervor lately brought on by a ward activity in which women made food for the men and then auctioned themselves off like cars for the men's choosing. only 4 women went.)
anyway, during this conversation i said something about how sometimes going to church makes me feel worse about myself because i am a woman. and PC - the close friend PC, the "he gives me hope that mormon men can be both progressive/open-minded and dedicated to the church" PC, the admires his very independent mother PC - that PC said "oh, come on, do you ACTUALLY feel like that at church?" in his "you are being extreme and ridiculous" voice. i was shocked. how could he think that i wouldn't feel like that? i feel like i have failed in that friendship somehow.


i think the reason these interactions upset me was because they happened with individual people from whom i expected more awareness. when the ward/church disappoints me, i just tell myself "that is the older generation. things are changing" or "those crazy people. i'm glad i have friends who understand me". perhaps my expectations have been too high. perhaps i am too sensitive to women's issues. either way, i'm left wondering whether i'll ever be at peace with "The Church"

traveling thoughts

i flew to NJ today. as i took the train from Newark down the coast to my grandparent's house, i thought about two things:

1) as soon as i arrive in NJ i am always ruder, more impatient, & more hurried. i think i subconciously feel i HAVE to act this way in NJ in order to relate to the culture here.

2) northern NJ is a trashy crap hole

why bother

i am only taking 3 classes this semester. i decided to make it easy and take two of them pass/fail and one graded (which i would have taken pass/fail if they would have let me. actually, i wouldn't have taken it at all). here are my midterm grades:

Environmental & Occupational Health: 90%
Emerging Infectious Diseases: 102% (?)
Epidemiology Theory: 100%

guess which one is the graded class?

random stuff

i haven't been feeling very blog inspired lately. here are some random things from the past few days:

- Albanian is a weird language. for example:
"U dogj nga qulli, i fryn kosit" - he got burned by the mush, so he blows on his yogurt. (a common phrase supposedly)
Brekushezi - a person wearing black pantaloons
Brenc - a special knife for scraping off burnt crusts of bread
Zhig-scorched residue burned to the bottom of a pot (the food sounds just fabulous)
Shitohet-a verb meaning "to be struck down by mountain or forest fairies" (this, apparently, is a problem in albania)

- also, i miss Boy. particularly last week when i was in TN & he was not

- the concept of interest kinda pisses me off when it applies to me & student loans. when it applies to me & making money on my mutual fund, i am a fan. the difference right now? 6% - not in my favor. freaking crap student loan interest rates. "low rates for students" my ass...

- today i ate several cookies at school. they were all shaped liked penises. they were decorated with words like "herpes" & "crabs". i found this to be hilarious. i am a 12 year old. or perhaps younger.

decatur is the new hollywood

there have been a lot of film crews around decatur lately. one of movies being filmed is "Zombieland", another one is "Halloween 2". as much as i'd love to see my town on the silver screen, both those movies sounds like crap. luckily, ABC filmed a TV pilot on the courthouse steps today. maybe it will be decent...

a conversation i observed between my parents

i think she needs to eat.

she just ate. check her diaper.

i don't do that.

yes you do. just pull back her diaper & look. you don't have to touch it.

i don't see anything.

let me show you how. see, it is soaking wet.

ok, mikeala, grandma is going to change your diaper.

no, grandpa is going to change your diaper.

life with the litter of nieces

i'm in k-town for spring break. when i walked in the door, my little sister said "Oh yay! Take this one" & handed me a baby. i've pretty much been holding one ever since. and, the toddler has pneumonia. so that is awesome.

the babies like to feed every two hours. it is really hard to feed, burp, & change two babies alone so someone is always on "night duty" along with my sister. i get the 10pm-3am shift. right now my mom is on 3am-8am shift, but once she goes back to work, i get the all night shift. fun.

Snow Day

there was a freak snow storm in atl this weekend. any snow in atl is a freak storm i guess. lots of people went out to play in the snow. true to the dynamics of my neighborhood, people weren't content with the typical...

this is how much snow we got - about an inch. my school was delayed & some were canceled. ha ha

some people in my neighborhood went with the standard snow family

my next door neighbors made a pyramid & a sphinx
(also, note how all the other snow was melted in less than 24 hours)

this was my favorite though. so creative!
(also, this is my favorite house in my neighborhood)

i am so smart. S-M-R-T!

my favorite computer is my mac. i also have this crappy old PC that i stole from my little sister to use for school b/c my statistics program only runs on windows. freakin crap microsoft. anyway, i have no idea how to use a PC. a while ago the PC stopped picking up wireless networks. i clicked on some random stuff, gave up, & called The Manorexic. he messed around with it for a few minutes and then said, see this little button in the front that says WLAN?
yeah?
you have it switched to off

i'm awesome.