1. conjoined twins
2. lady having a baby
3. disaster of some type (hurricane, train wreck, etc.)
4. infidelity
5. suspected supernatural visitors (ghosts, aliens, etc.)
6. the mafia
7. loved one in trouble
Friday, February 27, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
the short end of the stick
i've seen a lot of very small people around atlanta lately. i don't think their numbers are actually growing or that i am more observant. i do think various people have taken to pointing out the diminutive stature of others to me. they shall remain nameless.
1) case one: driving in the car with someone. we stop at a corner. mid-sentence, she stops and says, "Look how little she is!". i look around and see a child on the corner standing with some adults. then i realize she is an adult nurse in her scrubs. how did i miss that? my fellow rider goes into a monologue about how she'd hate to be so small & everyone in her family is at least 5'9"
2) case two: in church. my seatmate leans over & says, "can you imagine being that small?" conversation on the topic of smallness ensues.
3) case three: on iChat. a bubble pops up, "seriously, what would it be like to be that small? where would you shop for clothes?"..."and, you always look younger. it could be hard to get people to take you seriously"...i mention you'd get carded for alcohol at lot too & that would get old.
at the towering height of 5'4" i can only have pity for all those short people...
1) case one: driving in the car with someone. we stop at a corner. mid-sentence, she stops and says, "Look how little she is!". i look around and see a child on the corner standing with some adults. then i realize she is an adult nurse in her scrubs. how did i miss that? my fellow rider goes into a monologue about how she'd hate to be so small & everyone in her family is at least 5'9"
2) case two: in church. my seatmate leans over & says, "can you imagine being that small?" conversation on the topic of smallness ensues.
3) case three: on iChat. a bubble pops up, "seriously, what would it be like to be that small? where would you shop for clothes?"..."and, you always look younger. it could be hard to get people to take you seriously"...i mention you'd get carded for alcohol at lot too & that would get old.
at the towering height of 5'4" i can only have pity for all those short people...
Monday, February 16, 2009
the slow road to hell
our lesson in relief society this past sunday was on apostasy. much comment was made on how we should never criticize/question our church leaders. i disagree, but rarely find it worth my time to openly disagree with a certain lace-clad girl. so i just read my ensign. having said that...
one of the reasons i disliked church in high school was the mutual hatred between my young women's president and me. i won't go into the details, but she did her best to convince me that i wasn't a very good person. unfortunately i had zero respect for her & took some pleasure in goading her into tirades not so subtly directed at me. she still avoids me when i visit my parents' ward. i think my attachment to the church would have been stronger if i had just skipped young women's my last two years of high school. (i have never met anyone as excited to get the hell out of YW & into RS as i was. i started going the day i graduated from high school - 3 months before turning 18)
the only way i made it through those years with a testimony was to question the things she taught & study them out for myself. it turns out she was wrong on several accounts. so i have no problem questioning or criticizing local leaders (although i try not to be too vocal about my issues). these days, i try respect them & the position they've been placed in, but it ends there. i don't think they are automatically good people that will unfailingly provide appropriate guidance. perhaps a flaxen cord is being wrapped around my neck, but it is better than two more years of bitter doubt & resentment.
one of the reasons i disliked church in high school was the mutual hatred between my young women's president and me. i won't go into the details, but she did her best to convince me that i wasn't a very good person. unfortunately i had zero respect for her & took some pleasure in goading her into tirades not so subtly directed at me. she still avoids me when i visit my parents' ward. i think my attachment to the church would have been stronger if i had just skipped young women's my last two years of high school. (i have never met anyone as excited to get the hell out of YW & into RS as i was. i started going the day i graduated from high school - 3 months before turning 18)
the only way i made it through those years with a testimony was to question the things she taught & study them out for myself. it turns out she was wrong on several accounts. so i have no problem questioning or criticizing local leaders (although i try not to be too vocal about my issues). these days, i try respect them & the position they've been placed in, but it ends there. i don't think they are automatically good people that will unfailingly provide appropriate guidance. perhaps a flaxen cord is being wrapped around my neck, but it is better than two more years of bitter doubt & resentment.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
i'm obsessed
to quote The Manorexic speaking of emailing out pictures of his nephew, "I just can't stop myself!" seriously though, i had to put up this one. aelish is shielding mikaela's eyes from the sun...or at least thinks she is.
what a good older sister!
what a good older sister!Wednesday, February 11, 2009
babies! babies! babies!
my twin nieces arrived last night! now look at their pictures & tell me how adorable they are! you can tell i'm excited because every sentence ends with an exclamation point!
Robert is thinking "oh, crap, the number of females in my house just doubled"
sleeping in their little beds next to each other
mikaela rowan ligon
caitlin brooke ligon
Robert is thinking "oh, crap, the number of females in my house just doubled"
sleeping in their little beds next to each other
mikaela rowan ligon
caitlin brooke ligonTuesday, February 10, 2009
my open letter
dear armed services,
please stop wasting my tax money on advertising for new recruits. you keep interrupting my online TV watching. also, we all know that if we join, we'll just get sent off to a war. you're not fooling anyone.
you are really annoying,
brooke
please stop wasting my tax money on advertising for new recruits. you keep interrupting my online TV watching. also, we all know that if we join, we'll just get sent off to a war. you're not fooling anyone.
you are really annoying,
brooke
Saturday, February 7, 2009
the best/most mormon night of my life
It began with a MARTA trip to downtown Atlanta. We didn’t really know which stop to get off at and after we picked one we ended up wandering around for a while, each one following the others like a small pack of lemmings. Eventually we stumbled upon the elusive & surprisingly large Phillips Area. The woman at the ticket booth said our tickets would be $147 for the section our comrades were already in. As we discussed our options, the scalpers who were about 20 feet from the ticket booth kept yelling “Ladies, I’ll give them to you for $10. Or free. You can have them for free!” despite the sign right next to them saying something about fines for scalpers. The ticket lady sensed the competition so she just printed out the tickets, slide them under the glass, and said “Have fun!” After staring at her for a moment of confused disbelief, I grabbed the tickets & we took off. That ticket lady is my hero.
We got to our seats just in time. A lull in the action had led to one of those silly “guess the price” games they play at pro sporting events. When the lady choose to trade in her gifts, she got a diamond ring & a proposal from her boyfriend on the Mega-tron in front of 18,000 hockey fans. I have ALWAYS wanted to see someone propose at a sporting event. Then, a member of our party caught one of those t-shirts shot out of the guns by cheerleaders. I missed that action because I was busy chatting with a couple from Rotterdam. I thought they might know a friend of the family. They didn’t, but I still got to feel cultured.
After the game we ended up setting up a croquet game in Centennial Olympic Park. Some of us were scared they would get a ticket for being in the park after dark, but they stuck it out anyway. The game was surprisingly entertaining & not only because I got to talk about SWPL and mock people. We had to leave when the police indeed showed up & told us we’d probably get shot if we stayed much later. It was okay though, because my team had already basically won.
By now we were getting hungry. Luckily, we happened upon Krispy Kreme where we ran into more policemen. This encounter passed without incident, a bit to my disappointment. Eventually we all reconvened at this guy’s house & played Wii Mario Kart on a projector. I discovered that I may be the world’s worst Mario Kart player in the world. One of the guys there only helped me feel better about myself when he assumed that the person driving straight at the wall for 5 minutes was me (it was not. shocking, i know). I only semi-redeemed myself on Wii Play.
So, marriage proposals, night games, desserts, & games at someone's house...it doesn't get more Mormon than that. And I loved it.
We got to our seats just in time. A lull in the action had led to one of those silly “guess the price” games they play at pro sporting events. When the lady choose to trade in her gifts, she got a diamond ring & a proposal from her boyfriend on the Mega-tron in front of 18,000 hockey fans. I have ALWAYS wanted to see someone propose at a sporting event. Then, a member of our party caught one of those t-shirts shot out of the guns by cheerleaders. I missed that action because I was busy chatting with a couple from Rotterdam. I thought they might know a friend of the family. They didn’t, but I still got to feel cultured.
After the game we ended up setting up a croquet game in Centennial Olympic Park. Some of us were scared they would get a ticket for being in the park after dark, but they stuck it out anyway. The game was surprisingly entertaining & not only because I got to talk about SWPL and mock people. We had to leave when the police indeed showed up & told us we’d probably get shot if we stayed much later. It was okay though, because my team had already basically won.
By now we were getting hungry. Luckily, we happened upon Krispy Kreme where we ran into more policemen. This encounter passed without incident, a bit to my disappointment. Eventually we all reconvened at this guy’s house & played Wii Mario Kart on a projector. I discovered that I may be the world’s worst Mario Kart player in the world. One of the guys there only helped me feel better about myself when he assumed that the person driving straight at the wall for 5 minutes was me (it was not. shocking, i know). I only semi-redeemed myself on Wii Play.
So, marriage proposals, night games, desserts, & games at someone's house...it doesn't get more Mormon than that. And I loved it.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
bill gates is my hero
i hate microsoft, but i love bill gates for his humanitarian efforts & how extreme he is about the need to fund health services.
at this year's TED conference, he said, "Malaria is spread by mosquitoes. I brought some here. I'll let them roam around. There is no reason only poor people should be infected."
then he opened a jar full of mosquitoes & unleashed them on the participants. it would have been better if the mosquitoes had actually been infected with malaria, but at least he made a good point.
at this year's TED conference, he said, "Malaria is spread by mosquitoes. I brought some here. I'll let them roam around. There is no reason only poor people should be infected."
then he opened a jar full of mosquitoes & unleashed them on the participants. it would have been better if the mosquitoes had actually been infected with malaria, but at least he made a good point.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
peer pressure
people i know (i don't know if i would call them "friends") have suggested i participate in the following things:
- 25 random things on facebook (if you don't know what i'm talking about, you live in a cave...or don't have facebook)
- blogs tags of all kinds (random things, pictures, something called carnivals?)
- those stupid email forwards
should i be doing these things? will i not fit in if i don't? will i be a cliche if i do? do my friends expect me to scorn such things when i secretly (ok, not so secretly. hello, i have a blog.) love to talk about myself & think the 25 things on facebook is a perfect excuse? or do my friends really want me to do these things b/c they tagged me?
i just don't know how to navigate this delicate social situation
i just don't know how to navigate this delicate social situation
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
burt's bees promotes peace & love
a while ago i met a girl in my ward. we've hung out a few times over the past few months. then, on sunday she asked to borrow my chapstick. and i let her. and tonight she let me borrow hers. now i know that we are true friends.
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